How Single Parenthood Changed My Friend Lisa
There is just something so wonderful and magical about bringing another human being in this world. It doesn’t only bring friends and family together, it also changes the way you understand and think about life.
Many of us have undergone smooth and happy pregnancies, while some had to deal with everything on their own. It’s never a good feeling to welcome a child and to only introduce him or her to one single parent, but for some, there isn’t much of a choice.
My friend Lisa was 23 when she gave birth to her daughter. Her boyfriend of 3 years somehow just bailed as soon as he found out she was pregnant. It was terrible, but Lisa didn’t have much of a choice. She contemplated on what she had to do in order to pay for her maternity care, university fees, rent, and other bills.
Her once “other half” left her on her own, pregnant, and broken. Despite her situation, she decided to move forward and start anew to spare her child the negative effects of a painful custody war and child support.
After Lisa gave birth, she was at the brink of depression. She had to quit school and started working two jobs to pay for her daughter’s needs and outstanding medical bills. She didn’t talk to anybody and felt like she had nobody to support her.
One day, she called me at the middle of the night and cried for a solid hour. I just sat on my couch and listened 3000 miles away. I told her to get help as soon as she could, for her baby’s sake. She promised me she would. The next month, I found all her social media accounts deactivated. Months went on, and nothing.
Lisa’s silence for 6 months got me really worried. One morning, when I came back home in Florida, I immediately went to her apartment to physically check what was going on. I found her mom and her daughter playing, but she wasn’t there. I talked to her mom Judy and asked how she was doing.
I remember bawling my eyes out when she suddenly went through the front door. I saw my best friend for the first time in years and she looked great! We talked for hours and I can tell how her situation changed her.
Eventually, she told me the reason why she just vanished. According to her, she attended counseling sessions, parenting classes and group therapy. She was told by her counselor to quit social media for a while and get back to it when she’s ready.
She channeled all her frustrations away by working out, and it did great as she lost a lot of weight and had never looked better! She kept talking about her Cambodian diet supplement, but I was too distracted on how she looked so different. I’m very glad that she lost so much weight and felt good about herself.
Then, she told me, that she needed to be the best version of herself before she can become the best parent she could possibly be. She was thankful for her family for supporting her and helping her especially when her and her daughter needed so much help.
You see, adversities are nothing when you have your family’s back. Lisa struggled on her finances and emotional roller coasters, but she somehow got through all of them with the help of her family. If you feel like there’s too much on your plate, don’t hesitate to ask for some help. Good friends and family are always there, ready to lend a helping hand.